Distractions

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Today would have been Bruce’s birthday. He would have been 52. 52! Wow! It’s hard for me to imagine him being 52. Perhaps that’s because he never will be.

I certainly had my down moments today. But, unlike other years, this year, when I had distractions, I was truly distracted from my grief.

I was able to concentrate in school today. When I moved my new desk into my room, I could think about that. And this may sound off to many of you, but it was so cool. I could be distracted. I could think of something else for part of the time.

I did have to confess to the kids that I was in bad mood. I told them I was in a bad mood because they aren’t doing their chores as well as they should. I told them I was in a bad mood because I need more time for studying than I am getting. I told them I was in a bad mood because it’s daddy’s birthday and I’m angry that he’s not here. I think the only one of the above they gave me some slack about was their dad’s birthday. The others they didn’t care about! That’s good too because apparently they too were distracted today and it wasn’t because it was dad’s birthday.

I think we’re healing.

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